I am a man

No, not "the man", I am a man. Yes women can do what I did, but it just isn't as satisfying saying, " I am an adult ", plus, I kinda said that last post. This is a bit of a grab-bag of info, but hey, this is my life, my triumphs, and my folly.
I have infinite things to learn in my short time here with and without you all. What you should know is that I washed my hands.
Emily and I are a potent combo, that is true with our hair as well. (fig 1) It formed a mass in our pipes, effectively stopping the pipes from doing their job. After removing the bottom U piece, I found that weird form hanging, visually, quite akin to the product of a colon cleanse. When I attempted to disconnect this beast from it's birth canal, it refused. I tugged and tugged. Matson hair may be fine, but in mass and fortified with soap and Clarke beard trimmings, it is strong. After ripping out the little gremlin, I noticed that I still couldn't see through the drainpipe. A clog still persisted. Mind you, this clog couldn't reach into the wall like the other one, but it had it's own prowess. Short hairs, soap, and something else (maybe?) formed a mass that felt (yes, I pulled it out with my fingers) like grainy, clay-ish jello. (fig 2)
I made some broccoli soup then during cleanup, the bag that I had filled some how tipped over. Oh the mysteries of gravity. Yes, it sounded pretty gross as it plopped onto our floor. (fig 3)
Also, I took some pics two weekends ago and have included a video of me iceboating to show you what it looks like. Sorry it isn't longer but my hands were losing function. (fig 4 and 5) please note the bending mast; that is normal. Actually, it should be bending more, but I had to chill out to sail and video at the same time. Its so cool.
If you haven't checked in in a while, there are other posts. look for the "older posts" button.
my best to you all,
g.

I've got it!

Some people like peanut butter and pickle sandwiches, some prefer roast beef, last night em and I went to an old theater in madison to see Yo La Tengo. Wikipedia explains the name,
" They chose the name "Yo La Tengo" (Spanish for "I've got it!") in an effort to avoid any connotations in English. The name came from a baseball anecdote. During the 1962 season, New York Mets center fielder Richie Ashburn and Venezuelan shortstop Elio Chacón found themselves colliding in the outfield. When Ashburn went for a catch, he would scream, "I got it! I got it!" only to run into Chacón, who spoke only Spanish. Ashburn learned to yell, "¡Yo la tengo! ¡Yo la tengo!" instead. In a later game, Ashburn happily saw Chacón backing off. He relaxed, positioned himself to catch the ball, and was instead run over by left fielder Frank Thomas, who understood no Spanish and had missed a team meeting that proposed using the words "¡Yo la tengo!" as a way to avoid outfield collisions.^[2] After getting up, Thomas asked Ashburn, "What the heck is a Yellow Tango?" "

For the shows that I've seen, I think this was the first one I saw as an adult. Em felt the same way too while discussing the show in our kitchen afterwards. Things that made me feel like an adult:
1. We went with our other super-famous friends, mark and missy, and stayed together as a group the whole time. No one got lost or cried in the bathroom.
2. we arrived late instead of seeing the opening band. After years of seeing opening acts, I know what I want to see, and sometimes you spin the opening-act wheel of consequences and win, other times I lose my hearing to some mock-up of a band that I don't like. last night I decided I'd rather enjoy the conversation with our friends over some act I've never heard. Sounds like I'm turning into a fuddy-duddy already.
3. We all brought earplugs, but didn't need them for most of the show.
4. we sat in the upper tier, and liked it like that. My days of being up front aren't over, it was just the kind of show i enjoyed sitting down.
5. None of us had to work the next day, or drive a long distance. Although it would have been worth it if that had been the case for me.

We didn't take any pictures, nor did we record the shows audio, sorry crew.

baby's first scrub race

I've probably already told you about it but in case you want some pictures to go along with my vague explanation of iceboating, here you go.


First let me tell you a bit about Geoff Sobering. Without him I would have spent a bunch of money building something that wouldn't have worked. Instead he allowed me to work with him on his back-up iceboat in trade for the use of said boat for the season. Nice guy. Geoff has a supreme understanding of physics, chemistry, woodworking, computers, oh and all things that make iceboats work. He is also humble on the border of self-deprecating. He picked me up this morning and we headed to Green lake Wi, which would eat seattle's greenlake for a snack. As we drive onto the ice, yup, drive, he unbuckles his seat belt and advises me to do the same. You don't wanna be strapped to a sinking car if it breaks through the ice. the doors are kept unlocked and he throws the keys on the dash. if anything happens (ice cracking), I am requested to drive straight to the shore.

We unpack the boats from geoff's wagon and trailer (fig 1 &2). This is when I would like to thank Jeremy Foust, my bother in law who selflessly donated a huge box of new gear ( 8 tops, 2 bottoms and 6 pair of gloves) to Em and I this summer. setting up the boats takes only half an hour. In that time, in 23 degree weather, the human core temp will drop. the down coat protected me well, but boat assembly requires the dexterity that only uncovered hands can provide. About every 2 minutes I would have to stop assembly because my hands had naturally scurried into the warm pockets of my coat.
Figure 3- the boat is complete.
Figure 4, this is the closest I can get to what it looks like as I sail. the boom (big black thing on the left) is usually lower and next to my head and blocks my view, to tack (turn) I have to duck down into the cockpit and let the boom pass over my helmet.

After failing to consistently catch the wind, I got some key pointers from geoff and I started sailing around the course. Other sailors rocket by me, from other directions, from my blind spot which is everywhere. if you're not accelerating, you're probably about to stop, and I'm struggling to keep going, barely aware of my surroundings as they jet at and around me silently. My neck is sore from laying down and holding up my head to look over my freezing toes. I need to take a moment. I pull off the course, put the break on, and look down at the ice. you know on movies when a giant laser gets fired? or when laser guns shoot? I keep hearing sounds like that. It's the ice, expanding, contracting, or cracking somewhere. what is this new world I stand on? (fig 4) somehow a fish has become frozen in this ice that has lured me here and keeps me from freezing to death in the chilly waters bellow. life is too short to not live in the moment for a little bit, the fish reminds me, and this sport requires more concentration than I have, so perfect. I will meditate at 25-45 mph in the freezing beautiful environs of my back yard. Not much has changed, there just aren't any slopes, avalanches, or trees.
I join my first scrub race and finish last, just as I thought. As we get ready to leave I take a shot at our two boats, (fig 6) the 277 is mine.
we're going out tomorrow, I can't wait.
g

Porcupines!

all right,
we've finally unpacked from this weekend and I have a bit of time to let you hill- skiing/ boarding fools in on a secret that no x-country skier is supposed to spill. The X in x-country stands for EXTREME! I was clocked at 97 mph right before that picture was taken.

After an early wakeup, a (much-appreciated) late arrival with our friends, Mark and Missy, bagels and carrots in the car, several gas station explorations ( the prius was weighted down and the roof rack full of skis ruins the aerodynamics and the ethanol mix all fight against my MPG so don't act surprised) and a detour through a more rural part of northern Wisconsin, we were finally out of the clouds and enjoying a sunny day. Small tourist-y towns lined the road and Mark kept the music going for the 6 hours it took us to get to the porcupine mts., which are closer to foot hills but we are grading on a curve out here.

We skied up hill for 3 miles through tall trees that defy definition since they were naked in terms of leaves. the forest was considerably brighter than the typical PNW-evergreen forest which aided us in getting to our yurt with some light. Just as we had hoped, there was plenty of firewood and enough paper and kindling to get the fire started right away. the yurt heated up in about a half hour, which is awesome when it's 14 degrees out. the building to the right stored kitchen stuff-we were supposed to cook outside the yurt. We are culinary outlaws now!

I got to chop wood in the morning.
It made me feel like a man.
I love to split wood. It's simple.
It makes me want to eat oatmeal and wear flannel.
While I was out, Em fixed up one of the best cups of black coffee I have ever had. The diamond shaped latice work of the walls and the sunbeamish 2x4s radiating from the domed skylight really draws your mind inward, to a calm place. We all got into the routines of snowy yurt life: walk to the frozen creek, break ice, get water in the big basin, bring it back to the yurt, filter it, get more for dishes, cook food, heat water, wash dishes, relax, repeat. We lucked out with fresh snow on friday and sunny skies on saturday, tough to beat. We did some exploring saturday and Mark took some photos, so credit due to him and em for documenting our joy.
Speaking of joy, We got back to our childhood (or my college) roots a bit and went sledding in the dark right outside the yurt, then to feel adult, we emptied a few flasks. I brought a 3/4 sized guitar out on a sled (which is called a Pulk when you affix poles to it) and Mark and I traded time playing. Mark has big skills, and an encyclopedic knowledge of Daniel Lanois and early Dave mathews songs. I sang some old standards and a few you haven't heard yet.

Mark, being smart, told me to keep the outhouse door open so I could enjoy the view. While I pondered the wonders of nature, he came back outside and snapped that shot of me. I know there are lot's of pics of me here, so how about one of me with my pants down.

Despite being slapped in the face with cold in the morning and stoking the fire to warm up the yurt in my long underwear, we had a great time. It would have been nice to have a whole crew of yall there, but none of you seem to want to follow us where ever we go. On the way back, we stopped by lake superior (in the park) and took some shots. Look at the piled up ice blocks! they're really about 20 feet high.
safe and sound in madison now, it's heating up to 32 today...
g

some explanation

so you're saying to yourself, (or your stuffed animals if you have the same gene set as our neighbor Carla (refer to future posts or past rants)) "what is up with the photos?" here at madison inc. we appreciate your inquiry.
here's the scoop: the squirrel was fattening itself up for winter, what that squirrel didn't anticipate was my desperate and inventive nature. I was 1 week away from making squirrel stew (despite my love of fluffy animals)and a pair of mittens when I got somewhat employed. many days were spent gazing at the soul-deadening list of awful jobs here in madison (would you like to wipe a crazy person's bum?) then get pleasantly distracted by squirrels frolicking on wires, trees and fighting over our pumpkin. frickin cute. you can hate 'em all you want, those little critters pretended to be my TV without knowing it. okay, that's the squirrel bein' cute.
the costumes:
it's halloween and our friend mark took this shot. Em is the ocean. please note the assortment of things in the ocean. She even had a plastic baggy foatin around on her backside. I can only guess that it was to represent the island of plastic garbage the size of texas (or bigger?) in the ocean. i never asked, I just thought it was brilliant. Em, always making a political statement while seeming fun and innocent. figures.
Then there's me. I'm dressed as "Gavin Clarke, the bestselling author of 'drink yourself rich'" It was easy for me to play that character, trust me. Do you like me in a turtle-neck?
So, there you have it.
Also, we have reserved a yurt about 6 hours North of here and will be spending the weekend cross country skiing with our friends mark and missy. we will not post pictures nor will we give a report in the future.

thanks,
remember to tip your waiter and we are taking requests.

Gavin

better late than never

yes yes yes, we moved away from you.
Sorry.
thanks for coming to visit em and I at our new web abode (a term that will soon be shortened to babode and used extensively).
There have been many reasons to write since leaving washington. I have been breaking personal records left, right, front and back since this whole shebang began. (shebang began in sheboygann?, whoa, my bad pun/ word play habit can really take a new turn now that you guys have to read the words instead of hearing them. I might have to watch myself a bit.) I now have made it as far east as chicago, for example. Before this trip, my most easterly travels took me to boseman montana where i had the chance to visit with my old pals travis and tommy. Also it was the first time shooting a shotgun. i do still want to watch the sun rise over the atlantic, but I will have to wait.
Ah, goals. dangle you carrots. someday I shall chomp on thee.
This is gonna be/ has been disorganized. there will be little structure to the paragraphs today. I will say that em and I are happy to be here, we had quite a good time coming out here, and building our nest in this birdhouse. I'm sure that later Em or I will fill you in about details of our triumphs, trials, and tuesdays, but for now, you will just have to accept the story that we are in madison wisconsin, a place few wish to visit, and not in south east asia again with a booming tourism business where em and I take people out to warm summery beaches, hot, humid forests, and beautiful caves then hop on mopeds back to our bamboo huts and cook amazing food for our guests. seriously?, did I just write that?
here's why I wrote that and why I'm writing today:

madison's weather report
high of 6
low of -3

our freezer is set to about 30. usually that means that it works its little tukus off to COOL the enclosed food, ice cubes and booze. Now it might as well be a microwave, heating up our food to a piping hot 30. yeah...so Em and I have discussed this with each other and with other folks as well, and it really is a "warm" day out here when the mercury stays above 20, but today counts as cold. Maybe we haven't acclimated yet and next year we'll be frolicking in our swimsuits with ice cubes tied to our arms and legs like wintery leaches, but so far we haven't done that. No complaints. We can still get plenty of vitamin D while we are getting freezer burn salting the driveway and sidewalk. does freezer burn look like sun tan? maybe i should lay out today in the back yard for a bit and find out...

Hey, could you pass the icicle scented freezer burn lotion, I don't wanna get too crispy.



hope this finds you all well.

Gavin